30 December 2008

Idiosyncratic annoyance #542: Ad hoc spelling alphabets

Which I will not refer to as a ‘pet peeve’, because the phrase ‘pet peeve’ is one of my idiosyncratic annoyances.

Monologue dramatique, d'après d'innumerables conversations téléphoniques que j’ai eu la malchance d’écouter:
Yes. The licence plate? It’s B T P 4 5 2. B as in Boy. T as in Top. P as in Paul. Four. Five. Two. Yes. No ... no, B. B as in Boy. Yes. Yes, that’s what I said. No ... wait ... did you say Boy or Toy? No, oh, okay, sorry, I said B as in Boy, not T as in Toy. Make it B as in Ball. You’ve got it. Yes. No, no, not P as in Paul, B as in Ball. Right. Then T as in Top. What? No. Top, not Pop. T as in Top. ...
Public service announcement: we have fixed spelling alphabets that were specifically designed by linguists in order to avoid this kind of ridiculousness.


Is it really so hard to remember — to use the best-known Anglophone example, the NATO spelling alphabetthe words Alfa, Bravo, Charlie, Delta, Echo, Foxtrot, Golf, Hotel, India, Juliett, Kilo, Lima, Mike, November, Oscar, Papa, Quebec, Romeo, Sierra, Tango, Uniform, Victor, Whiskey, X-ray, Yankee, Zulu? (There are plenty of other well-designed ones if you feel that the aeronautical connotations of that alphabet are a bit much for customer service.)

Misspelling alphabets, of course, are an art in themselves. My best effort thus far (drawing on the work of others, including examples here and here): Aye, Bdellium, Cue, Dzo, Ewe, Felindre, Gneiss, Hour, Ian, Juan, Knight, Lladró, Mneme, Nxuba, Oestrogen, Ptyxis, Quay, Rzeszów, Sea, Tchotchke, Uakare, Vates, Wring, Xylem, Yves, Zollverein.

Suggestions for improvements are welcomed.

49 comments:

Unknown said...

"Ian"
Your word of honor, no seach-engines. What meaneth the anglicized Scottish-Gaelic name in English, Irish-Gaelic & what is the (fairly mainstream) traditional Gaelic spelling?

Unknown said...

Gyf þú swá andgietful síe, canstu mé sæcgean hwílicne sprecan ðone ic nú wrítu?
Ic undriu hwægðer þín múþ als mycel als brægn ðín. Ðú wýrpes lædeniscu word hiðer and ðiðer, ác casntu rihte lædeiscu word útsæcgean,ðon/ðy ilcan als Uirgilius, Pompeius oððe Iulius Caesar, oððe woldestu ðá word mid ðínum úcwide wancwellan. hwone hit tó réordum, indoeuropeiscum, germaniscum, grecciscum oððe ítaliscum cymeþ, swá forspillu ic þec.

Unknown said...

pronounce 'vates' in Classical Latin pronunciation, c. 200 BC. To what Scando-Gothonic (later deity) is 'uates' conate?

Anonymous said...

buy generic ambien online ambien cr 12.5 overdose - ambienoverdose.org

Anonymous said...

buy valium online valium 10mg vs klonopin - effects valium unborn baby

Anonymous said...

buy diazepam diazepam generic al shafa flashback - buy diazepam in australia

Anonymous said...

generic xanax can you overdose xanax xr - buy xanax bars online

Anonymous said...

generic zolpidem zolpidem 80mg - zolpidem what dosage

Anonymous said...

generic ativan lorazepam ratiopharm 1mg wirkung - buy lorazepam europe

Anonymous said...

diazepam dog buy diazepam online usa - diazepam sale online

Anonymous said...

order ativan ativan constipation - ativan side effects wiki

Anonymous said...

diazepam online buy diazepam 10mg tablets - diazepam for vertigo

Anonymous said...

buy ativan buying ativan online safe - highest dosage ativan

Anonymous said...

can you really buy xanax online buy xanax hong kong - drug interactions soma xanax

Anonymous said...

generic soma buy soma online credit card - order soma watson online

Anonymous said...

order valium valium 5 mg xanax - valium 10mg equal xanax

Anonymous said...

order carisoprodol soma drug schedule - buy somatropin hgh uk

Anonymous said...

purchase soma generic soma wiki - carisoprodol 350 mg wiki

Anonymous said...

ambien online pharmacy buy ambien cr usa - ambien 12.5 overdose

Anonymous said...

ambien online drug interactions valium ambien - ambien 6.5 cr

Anonymous said...

Blogger: Venia Legendi - Post a Comment purchase prednisone - prednisone asthma http://www.ourdailybreadmarket.net/#prednisone-asthma

Anonymous said...

Blogger: Venia Legendi - Post a Comment buy acomplia rimonabant - cheap acomplia http://www.a6soft.com/#cheap-acomplia

Anonymous said...

Blogger: Venia Legendi - Post a Comment buy lorazepam - lorazepam online http://www.ativanonlineoffer.com/#lorazepam-online

Anonymous said...

Blogger: Venia Legendi - Post a Comment order acomplia - buy acomplia no prescription http://www.a6soft.com/#buy-acomplia-no-prescription

Anonymous said...

Liquid Liquid Extraction Drugs generic prednisone online - generic prednisolone http://www.prednisone4sale.com/#generic-prednisolone

Anonymous said...

Alcohol Drug Abuse Treatment Center buy prednisolone - buy prednisolone online http://www.prednisone4sale.com/#buy-prednisolone-online

Anonymous said...

Hello, discount lipitor - cost of generic lipitor http://www.costoflipitoronline.net/#cost-of-generic-lipitor

Anonymous said...

Drug Alcohal Test Kits purchase topamax no prescription - purchase topamax http://www.topamaxdiscount.com/

Anonymous said...

Keyes Drug Auburndale Massachusetts topamax pills - topamax for migraines http://www.topamaxbetterprice.com/

Anonymous said...

Miglitol Drug Interaction fluconazole without prescription - diflucan without prescription http://www.diflucansaleonline.net/#diflucan-without-prescription , [url=http://www.diflucansaleonline.net/#order-diflucan ]order diflucan [/url]

Anonymous said...

Desiccated Liver Pills diflucan without prescription - order diflucan http://www.diflucansaleonline.net/#order-diflucan , [url=http://www.diflucansaleonline.net/#diflucan-without-rx ]diflucan without rx [/url]

Anonymous said...

Special Education Student Medications escitalopram cost - escitalopram no prescription http://www.costoflexaproonline.net/#escitalopram-no-prescription , [url=http://www.costoflexaproonline.net/#escitalopram-online ]escitalopram online [/url]

Anonymous said...

Anciant Egyptian Tablets generic lexapro online - lexapro cost http://www.costoflexaproonline.net/#lexapro-cost , lexapro for sale

Anonymous said...

Drug Test Alcohol meridia pills online - meridia without prescription http://www.meridiaonlineorder.net/#meridia-without-prescription , generic reductil

Anonymous said...

tfv buy terbinafine tablets online - buy generic terbinafine http://www.lamisilonlinerx.net/#lamisil-cost, terbinafine 250 mg without prescription

Anonymous said...

rvb order topamax online no prescription - cheap topamax no prescription http://www.painreliefpharmonline.net/topamax.html, purchase topamax no prescription

Anonymous said...

6, imitrex for sale - imitrex online pharmacy http://www.imitrexonlinebuy.com/#buy-sumatripan, [url=http://www.imitrexonlinebuy.com/#sumatriptan-no-prescription]imitrex sale online[/url]

Anonymous said...

Li, Generic Provigil - provigil no prescription http://www.provigilbenefitsonline.net/, [url=http://www.provigilbenefitsonline.net/]Provigil Without Prescription[/url]

Anonymous said...

Li, accutane online - accutane without rx http://www.isotretinoinrxonline.net/, [url=http://www.isotretinoinrxonline.net/]accutane no prescription[/url]

Anonymous said...

Hi, generic nexium - discount nexium http://www.wolverinefoodandspirits.com/, [url=http://www.wolverinefoodandspirits.com/]generic nexium[/url]

Anonymous said...

4, Isotretinoin Price - cheap generic accutane http://www.benefitsofisotretinoin.net/, [url=http://www.benefitsofisotretinoin.net/]Isotretinoin No Prescription[/url]

Anonymous said...

4, Lamisil Sale - buy lamisil no prescription http://www.lamisilfast24.net/, [url=http://www.lamisilfast24.net/] Buy Lamisil [/url]

Anonymous said...

4, Price of Lamisil - lamisil tablets for sale http://www.lamisilfast24.net/, [url=http://www.lamisilfast24.net/]Order Lamisil [/url]

Anonymous said...

2, [url=http://www.klonopincheaponline.com/]klonopin no prescription [/url] - buy clonazepam online no prescription - order klonopin online no prescription http://www.klonopincheaponline.com/.

Anonymous said...

5, Atomoxetine Online - Buy Strattera Online - generic strattera cost http://www.stratterarxcoupon.net/ .

Anonymous said...

14, generic accutane - buy accutane - buy isotretinoin online http://www.horprese.com/.

Anonymous said...

13, Buy Clonazepam - Klonopin Sale - cheap clonazepam http://topbookmarksonline.com/

Anonymous said...

Nice replies in return of this mаtter with fіrm аrgumеnts аnd desсribing аll about thаt.


Here is my pagе :: coffee pure cleanse dr oz

Anonymous said...

You shoulԁ be a ρaгt οf a cοnteѕt
for one of the greateѕt ѕiteѕ on thе net.
I will highly reсommenԁ this blog!


Mу pagе - Cheap Car Insurance